Let me first say that I don't enjoy writing depressing entries. Yes, yes, Mr Stress Personified notwithstanding.
But really, dear God, I'm about to break down. I feel defeated academically, and it's draining me, mentally, emotionally, and heck, even physically. Nobody seems to get me, too. I'm just sort of here, in a totally different wavelength from everyone else, and it gets lonely. Sure there are people who genuinely care for me and want to be in sync with me (more people than I think I deserve too, thank you), but I dunno, maybe I'm too off, too unpredictable and wayward for anyone. Maybe I like to feel lonely and miserable, and I'm secretly enjoying being in the dumps. Yes, yes, a real possibility. Oh, and I'm Mr Butt of All Jokes of late, and it's the sort of thing that one likes to ride along with, but subconsciously it eats at you slowly.
There's this thing I do that indicates when my stress level peaks. I did it last night, and I did it earlier this afternoon. It's not a fun thing, it's not even intentional -- it just happens. If it's any consolation, I feel better afterwards.
I've been thinking of something deliberate I should do when my stress level peaks, like right now. I never got around doing it, and I think ultimately it would do me a world of good.
Dear God help me get through the next four days,and help me hurdle two more exams. And then help me with my HYP.
And so goes another post that's not for Multiply.
2 comments:
im in the dumps myself and got a korean to cut my hair. if i keep doing this i'll be bald soon.
Hi Partner! Bio-cycles & biorhythms are part of life and give interest to it! It's how you handle them that matters, using imperfect tools of intellect and emotion. All in all, it's your will that determines your direction. Sometimes, though, the better course, after due reason fails, may be total trust in Divine Providence. God loves us, wherever we are, whatever we do!
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