Indisposed

Indisposed

Yeah, that's just the nice way of saying I'm not in the mood.

The revision for the exams must have gotten to me, although I'm pretty sure that's not all that's agitating me right now. And "right now" is an important time too, barely three days before my first exam in a string of five.

Yeah. Three days before my exams. What a time to stray from my intended study master plan. What a time to go all ballistic over what other people would find trivial.

Let it be noted that this is again one of those times that I wish for a private blog. Because that way, I can rant more fucking freely.

What the hell, I'm gonna say it here anyway. I hate spoilers. I hate noisy people in the library. I hate noisy spoilers in the cinema. Fucking spoiled my Harry Potter.

Since I'm so annoyed, let me direct my annoyance at those who read my blog but never mention that they do. I hate you too, you lurkers.

If you lurker, would kindly wish to un-lurk yourself and enter my circle of trust, send me an email or comment privately in this blog. This lurker issue is driving me crazy. Maybe I should put a make this a "Friends Only" blog, but that doesn't quite sit well with me, as some random visitors turn out to be nice friends too, e.g. Kiko and Cruise and Tatatee.

Hmm.. let the one who most deserves it not be spared my infliction of hatred: myself. I hate myself right now, for not studying hard enough, for making a stupid timetable only to render it dynamic and flexible and delaying everything, for giving in to distractions whenever I'm supposed to be studying, and mostly, for allowing myself to get affected by things that I cannot control.

God I feel like such a loser. A bitter, fucked-up loser who's losing it.

Dammit, I'm cramming five modules' worth of information in my head, please bear with me.

Jesus help me.


P.S. I've just read this post, and it seems like I've spewed out a lot of stuff here. That should be enough. That should be a release of the toxins that's been stored too long in my head. Supposedly, I should feel better.

It's 5:37PM now. I've decided that I shall forget this episode and carry on with my life at 6:00PM, and feel better. For now I'm taking a shower.